Category Archives: Kids mess

Summer time wasting

In the summer holidays were all looking for things to keep the kids occupied, so please can I pass on my little tip to you. Having just got back from a very rainy and muddy Camp Bestival weekend at certain times it was easier said than done entertaining our little rugrats, but we stumbled upon something rather wonderful when inside the tent because rain had stopped playing.

Eating jelly with a fork it turns out is hilarious, tasty and takes a long time cos it keeps dropping off. How brilliant, I'm applying this principle to everything during the next month to see if it will hold off the screams of "Mummmmmmyyyyyyy!" (See my last blog) I wonder what else I can do it with? Spaghetti with a cocktail stick? Drawing only with things found in the garden?

Winning at festivals 

I have a really romantic view about taking my child to a festival. The reality is very different. She is of course bored by the time we reach 2 meters past the entrance, but I persevere and blow up and air lounger which entertains her for approximately 5seconds because she has her own personal bouncy castle. But, after she has fallen into 10 people and knocked over five drinks, it’s time to put it away. This will carry on for approximately five hours while I try and drink a pint of cider and watch a band.
I have however found a real advantage to having a 4 year old at one of these gatherings. The queue for the loo was about 200 people strong and not going down very quickly. With a little girl covered in glitter bouncing from one foot to another, shouting “I neeeed a weeeeee!” and “It’s gonna come out!” it’s amazing how many people let you in front of them. We were at the front and looking for a cubicle within 20 seconds and from then on I took her to the toilet with me whether she wanted to go or not.

Ask questions carefully 

You have to be careful what you ask small children don’t you? Here is my case in point – this week I asked my four-year-old daughter if she would like an ice cream.I offered her strawberry, chocolate, or vanilla. When she chose to have a bit of all three I delivered it to her at the table and asked “Am I the best mummy in the world or what?” “What!” came the reply.

The bugs are with us

We are just full of germs. The car will have to be fumigated rather than valeted when it goes back to Snows. I’m coughing and spluttering all over the dashboard of my Yaris, whilst little one has an endless stream of green coming from her nose, which ends up on the window, the seats and the door handle, anywhere apart from in the tissue. 

I’m sure that our vehicle had that lovely new car smell when we first drove it away from the showroom, that’s now been replaced by a whiff of Olbas oil and calpol. 

Cos you aren’t gold

My little girl is well impressed with having the Toyota Yaris to take her to pre school and says she likes silver…..but gold is the best, can’t we have a gold one? (It’s actually gun metal grey and I really like it, it hides a fair amount of dirt) .

Car diary update…

Foods eaten- sausage roll, a banana, bread sticks, kinder egg and a packet of monster munch
Mess made- used wet wipes, chocolate smears from a kinder egg, crisps ground into the seat, sticky hand marks on the windows
Luggage acquired- 4 blankets, a talking bird, little ted, a kinder dinosaur, 3 pine cones, a hockey stick and a bike
Toyota Yaris bonus points – I haven’t even had to fill her up with petrol, the hybrid is working for us.

IT’S NOT A BOOK!!!

It’s the most entertaining drive to work, seeing all the kids walking to school dressed as their favourite characters for World Book Day. I was really proud of Rich from heart Breakfast, who came to work dressed as the very Hungry Caterpillar (This may or may not have happened). There’s always a Harry Potter at each school, a ‘Tiger that Came to Tea’ and Where’s Wally for such a fantastic day to encourage reading. But there were also questionable costumes that I think come from parents that forget this worldwide day until the night before and raid the dressing up box. Little Bo Peep was the first one to make me say “Is that a book? “I thought it was a nursery rhyme?” Then I saw a girl dressed as a my little pony toy, as far as I’m aware they’re on the tele too, but not in books. I also clocked a teacher go dressed with bright pink hair, as Poppy from the film Trolls. Yes, the FILM Trolls. Are they from books? I suppose you can get colouring books and an Annual every year.