Author Archives: badmum2013

About badmum2013

I'm a thirty something single mum. Struggling to keep up with my daughter, born in February, and how quickly she's changing, alongside presenting the Heart Breakfast show every weekday.

A sport of sorts….

It sounds posh so I thought we'd go and have a look at a game of polo at the New Forest club. It was so lovely, we took a picnic and sat in front of the car on a rug eating jam sandwiches and sausages, while watching the ponies hurtle up and down the pitch. The sweetest moment came the next day though, when my 4 year old daughter was asked what she had done at the weekend and she replied "we watched horses play hockey!" Well, it sort of is isn't it?

Less screens/more screens

Another week and another warning that we shouldn't let our children be on a screen for too long. I totally get it, you don't want your kids being zombielike after they've watched YouTube for an hour and a half. Equally I have lots of things to do, the dinner, the washing and it just buys me a little bit of time. It also gives her a little bit of chill, she's been chasing around all day in the woods, getting muddy and to sit quietly and watch an episode of Peppa Pig is great.

I feel like I'm doing good parenting if I say to my four year old "put the iPad down and come and watch the tele!"

And I've seen the tutting majority in a restaurant, when I gave my daughter my phone to watch videos, they look scornfully at me, but what would you rather a full on meltdown tantrum to go with your dinner or a nicely behaved child sitting at table watching a screen.

And then this week another report saying that we need more computer programmers so we should let our children go on computers more, make your mind up.

Summer time wasting

In the summer holidays were all looking for things to keep the kids occupied, so please can I pass on my little tip to you. Having just got back from a very rainy and muddy Camp Bestival weekend at certain times it was easier said than done entertaining our little rugrats, but we stumbled upon something rather wonderful when inside the tent because rain had stopped playing.

Eating jelly with a fork it turns out is hilarious, tasty and takes a long time cos it keeps dropping off. How brilliant, I'm applying this principle to everything during the next month to see if it will hold off the screams of "Mummmmmmyyyyyyy!" (See my last blog) I wonder what else I can do it with? Spaghetti with a cocktail stick? Drawing only with things found in the garden?

The easiest way for a mum to make money

I reckon I've solved the gender pay gap problem. You have a jar in your house, much like a swear jar, but instead of putting in a pound for every naughty word uttered, a quid goes in every time someone says/shouts/screams the word mum. In my house I'd be on about £100 an hour, I'll be a millionaire in no time!

Got to go, just earned myself another fiver!

Trying to sleep in the heat hell

Last night was hell trying to get my little girl to sleep in the heat. We’d been in the garden all afternoon when it was 30 degrees and she been led in a sleeping bag cos she’s cold in the shade! So, it came as no surprise that her bedroom was too hot to go to sleep. She still of course wanted her duvet and 15 blankets covering her and I stayed for five minutes holding a hand so that should settle down. 10 minutes later she’s up again and asking for a drink and taking her pyjamas off. I put her back in bed but then heard a voice from the top of the stairs asking to go into my room because it’s cooler. Then she couldn’t sleep because I wasn’t with her so I got into my bed and waited for her to close her eyes, that didn’t happen. 
Boiling under the duvet she started a conversation about when she’s a grown-up and she has a baby in her tummy. Will it be a boy or a girl, what names will they have, will I then be a nanny and will she be a mummy? No sign of sleep yet. We are now two hours into the bedtime routine and she starts to close her eyes when we hear the familiar sound of Mr whippy!Why does the ice cream van have to come past playing the music at 8.45 when all the windows are open? No, I don’t know what that noise is! No that isn’t an owl doing magic! Yes I can hear an aeroplane, but GO TO SLEEP!!! 

Winning at festivals 

I have a really romantic view about taking my child to a festival. The reality is very different. She is of course bored by the time we reach 2 meters past the entrance, but I persevere and blow up and air lounger which entertains her for approximately 5seconds because she has her own personal bouncy castle. But, after she has fallen into 10 people and knocked over five drinks, it’s time to put it away. This will carry on for approximately five hours while I try and drink a pint of cider and watch a band.
I have however found a real advantage to having a 4 year old at one of these gatherings. The queue for the loo was about 200 people strong and not going down very quickly. With a little girl covered in glitter bouncing from one foot to another, shouting “I neeeed a weeeeee!” and “It’s gonna come out!” it’s amazing how many people let you in front of them. We were at the front and looking for a cubicle within 20 seconds and from then on I took her to the toilet with me whether she wanted to go or not.